Mini Disclaimer: I love books and if I fall in love with a book, I will talk about it non-stop. I mostly write these “reviews” for myself, so I can go back and read my thoughts for that particular time. If you read this book, I would love to know your opinion about it 🙂 So here it is ^_^
“We never had the opportunity to choose what to believe or what not to believe… We didn’t even choose our own name.”
The book starts with how we are born and instantly are domesticated by the adults. As it says in the quote we could not even choose our name, what language we are speaking, what religion we are following and etc. Everything is taught by the adults, who were brought up the same way by their parents. “We become a copy of Mamma’s beliefs, Daddy’s beliefs, society’s beliefs and religions’s beliefs.” All of these truly shape us as a human being, and that’s when we lose our freedom. We start to think what is right and wrong according to the beliefs we were programed to follow.
The author gives “four agreements” to find your true self and become the person you want to be.
The first agreement is “…be impeccable with your word.
Your word is the power that you have to create. Your word is the gift that comes directly from God. The Gospel of John in the Bible, speaking of the creation of the universe says, “In the beginning was the word, and the word was with God, and the word is God.” Through the word you express your creative power. It is through the world that you manifest everything.
The world is a force…
Your word is pure magic, and misuse of your word is black magic.”
It talks about how Hitler used words to manipulate thousands of people to do what he wanted, how his words destroyed lives.
The Second agreement is “don’t take anything personally”. You might hear a comment or so about you and your character but it should not mean anything. Because that person who talks about you can change his/her mind daily. When one is happy, he/she loves everything and everyone, when one is unhappy, he/she hates everything and everyone. It is the same way how our parents one day can be proud of us and think that we are the best thing that happened to them, and the next day they might be angry at you and perceive you as this horrible child who doesn’t follow any rules. As long as you know what kind of person you are, you should not care what other people think.
The third agreement is “don’t make assumptions.”
“In any kind of relationship we can make the assumption that others know what we think, and we don’t have to say what we want. They are going to do what we want because they know us so well. If they don’t do what we want, what we assume they should do, we feel hurt and think, “How could you do that? You should know.” Again, we make the assumption that the other person knows what we want. A whole drama is created because we make this assumption and then put more assumptions on top of it.”
If you want to know something, you should just ask that person.
“If you don’t understand, ask. Have the courage to ask questions until you are clear as you can be… And find your voice to ask what you want. Everybody has the right to tell you no or yes, but you always have the right to ask. Likewise, everybody has the right to ask you, and you have the right to say yes or no.”
The fourth agreement is “always do your best”.
There will be days that your “best” will vary, but as long as you are striving for your best, you will achieve everything you want in your life. “You can have many great ideas in your head, but what makes the difference is the action. Without action upon an idea, there will be no manifestations, no results, and no reward.”
“Practice makes the master.”
I loved this book, because it reminded me that if I want to people love me the way I am, I should love people the way they are. And if I want to change them a slightest, it means that I don’t love them as they deserve. I think it is a human nature to try and change someone, make them what we perceive them to be. When they aren’t “acting” the way we want them to be, we get angry at them. I liked the message when it says if you notice that someone is trying to change you, you need to walk away. Change will happen, only if that person himself/herself wants to change. You can help them, if they ask you to help.
The last thing that I want to touch upon is forgiveness. “Forgiveness is the only way to heal.” I think we can all agree that when are mad at someone who mistreated us, we hold the grudge and that negativity destroys us, not those people. So we should let go of any of that and let us heal ourselves. And you let other people abuse you emotionally and physically, because subconsciously you think you deserve that. You abuse yourself more than anyone else. Your thoughts, how you treat your body, surroundings, hate that you carry within you. And this book pretty much “guides” you towards the inner peace.
I was really impressed with this book. It was an easy read. I’m sure I will re-read this book many times, because I want those agreements to be engraved on my brain and try to practice them daily.